am i that easy to been step over ?

People now days just don give me the respect that I need, it's like wtf :( it's really sad and I don think I can really lead ;( old crew say I'm too kind to new crews, always warning warning last warning. No action taken, and I'm really too kind?? I'm kind is because it's how I treat people :) I will smile to them talk to them nicely cause what I think is if I treat them nicely and with respect they will do back the same to me but NOOOO! they just fuckjng climb over my head !!!! Take my words for nothing !!! I'm trying so hard to cover for them, protect them from higher ranking people, but in return people tan to climb ? Wat is this. No wonder they say it's hard to lead, easy to follow. Hiaz, all I wanted is leads and crew can be as one but now think of it, no way it's too hard. Lucky there is still people like ling Yi Mei bear tham Teo Huda Nura yen ting Claire Shu Wen vince alinia they all :) still got old crews :) if not I think I'll cry maybe ? Hahaha silly me, if not for them I'll stay in Shrek le I came back is because of them ;) and Jpr is my first home :) but without them, I'm sry I'll leave not because I cant stand the work load or wat it's because my family is not there anymore le :( I love every single one if them <3 through the bottom of my heart :) I love Jpr Feel like crying le hahaha

:(

It's been so long since I last post hahaha but well in back now:) This is like my official place to rang out my worries :( first I think I lost my passport -_- in my house!!! I can't find it sia !!! Like REALLY!!! Omg but my mom is like a cool. Which I think she kept it back -_- and letting me worrying or nothing -_- nice job mom hahaha Second is . . . . I got my own laptop le hahaha like a finally !!!! :D so goner take care of it hahaha :D Third is I have some thinking of being back single again -_- like seriously hahaha silly me. When I was single I wan a gf now have one think of single -_- Charles wat is this, wat u wan? Huh! Hiazzzzz just some random thoughts. I have lots of random thoughts lately like 1) if I die will anyone notice? Or if I go missing ? 2) y people are hiding stuff from me :( It's like come on I'm not dumb -_- I know ok is I act blur not to show u I know -_- I'm a cancerian , cancerian are very observant people hahaha I'm not that stupid -_- And lastly :( I'm goner spend lesser tine with Jpr le :( still can rmb I started last year June :) like a fun everyone is so nice to me and we had alot crazy times :) this year is even more crazy with all this new batch of crew too haha so goner miss every single one of them :( once I start school I'll be only working once per week le ba :( or even none :( hiaz all the sudden I don feel like starting school Le :( I misses Jpr even now :( I wish I won't have any off days hahaha then I can spend my days in Jpr with all the crews hahaha love them all but sometimes they get abit too out of hand hahaha man some times I wish I was not a lead ;( it's hard to work as a lead with crew as friends :( u have to be fair and surely people will talk bad about u not matter wat u do or how good u do :( Sometimes I feel no one respect me as a lead ;( I have to talk nicely to them as sometimes no one listens:( damn I'm bad at this :( but well wat can I do about it, it's life and I just have to suck it up ;) A smile a day keeps bad things away:D But some thing the person with the biggest smile is the saddes person :( cause they use smiles to cover up their sadness? Hahaha Come on Charles u can one :) ur not a emo person ;) *don be emo don be emo don be emo *