passing day

Today's a day of mixture of feelings.

Started out happy due to after rain, seeing the sun came back out, with me wondering what's life ultimate purpose is. 

School today was awesome, same thing everyday, just trying to finish all my assignments.

Got a little high as i had too much sugar today :( 

Think i got too much lameness around my classmates, but then that's me :)

Got a little piss off today when ben told me to shut up twice. 

Got even more piss when i lost my house keys.

Exploded when people agree on the timing but never happen. 

But all in the end i cool myself down and think, come on Charles it's all not worth it right ?

we are all friends and bros and sis, there are no such things as pissed over small things.

Forgive forget.

So what if they know your piss? 

So what if they said sorry?

what if things got worse cause of the little things that make you piss?

It's all in we humans right, to try live in each others life, to know each others right.

I dare to say i don't really know my friends well. 

They ever asked me to open up to them, but o well as a cancer it's really hard i swear.

We have so many different kinds of feelings inside of us and not forgetting our over thinking minds too.

We tend to think too much, in result making simple stuff into complicated issues.

Sometimes i rather keep my smile going :) hide every single thing inside,

Cause the truth is, the lesser people know the lesser they really care.

You don't share your problems, people think you ok and your fine. 

Sometimes i wonder, why tell others your bad news or bad problems? 

All you do is pass down unhappiness right?

Some may even trigger back old bad memories of others.

My computer in school has this very cute rabbit toy display on it.

I named it "Da Tuo" after the death of my rabbit.

My good friends gave it to me, along with a card that wrote, you can share your problems with me.

I'm really touch :) really 

but just that the toy some how makes me think back of my pass away rabbit. 

It makes me kind of sad and wants to cry.

It's not my friends fault nor i'm trying to blame anyone.

It's just me, that i cant let it all go.

I'm just trying to say that sometimes, the little things you do may hurt or trigger some painful thoughts of others without you knowing.

This comes back to my ultimate though today, 

what is the real purpose of life really.

My friend once said, 

Life is ugly,

I reply,

That's why you are here, to live it beautifully.